Purpose Statement: Persuade audience that UIowa should offer free flu shots.
Thesis Statement: The University of Iowa should offer students the influenza vaccine for free.
INTRO:
1. Offering the vaccine to students for free is beneficial to the University of Iowa community.
"The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention said last week that flu killed 80,000 Americans last year and sent 900,000 to the hospital—the deadliest influenza season in years." -San Diego State University, Oct. 9th, 2018
- Campuses are perfect places for spread of sickness, vaccines are necessary
- The hefty price of a vaccine and insurance coverage uncertainty turns people away
- More sickness and academic distress prevented in the long run with a change of policy
- THESIS- The University of Iowa should offer students the influenza vaccine for free in the SHW sites.
BODY:
1. Campus is a highly prosperous environment for influenza, it puts unvaccinated students at risk.
Condusive conditions (CDC)
- spread it to others up to about 6 feet away
- spread mainly by droplets made when people with flu cough, sneeze or talk
- Spread by landing in the mouths or noses of people who are nearby or possibly be inhaled into the lungs
- spread by touching a surface or object that has flu virus on it and then touching their own mouth, nose, or possibly their eyes
2. The high cost of the influenza vaccination deters students from getting vaccinated.
No Budget Room
- $55 is a hefty amount to pay
- College students are already on low budget, if having any spending money
- Many students do not prioritize vaccine into their needed expenses (food, gas, fun)
Insurance Efficacy
- Many students, like myself, don't know if insurance covered flu shot
- Unsure how to find out
- Uncertainty will lead to less students even attempting to get the shot
3. SOLUTION: The University of Iowa should offer influenza vaccinations to students for free in the Student Health and Wellness locations. Other schools have set precedents that can be used as a model, including San Diego State University. This will positively affect our student's health and academics.
SDSU as Base Model
- "The free flu vaccine is available during October, while supplies last. Last year, more than 1,200 students were vaccinated, and Student Health Services (SHS) anticipates higher demand this year. The effort is a partnership between SHS in the Division of Student Affairs and the County of San Diego."
- The University of Iowa could work as a partnership between SHW, College of PH, and Johnson County Public Health to allocate funds and/or apply for a federal grant.
4. JUSTIFICATION
Herd Immunity- University needs to provide the safest environment for all persons using their campus- Definition- "A situation in which a sufficient proportion of a population is immune to an infectious disease (through vaccination and/or prior illness) to make its spread from person to person unlikely. Even individuals not vaccinated (such as newborns and those with chronic illnesses) are offered some protection because the disease has little opportunity to spread within the community" CDC
- When more people get vaccinated, students who still don't/visitors/family will be better protected
- Less absences in classes that students are paying lots for
- Prevented distraction of taking care of oneself
- Prevent falling behind/making up work
Opposition-
How is the university supposed to pay for this? Partner with surrounding programs
Why not just lower cost? Students are more likely to show up if cost is not a worry at all
How is the university supposed to pay for this? Partner with surrounding programs
Why not just lower cost? Students are more likely to show up if cost is not a worry at all
CONCLUSION:
1. Review of problem points (Body 1 and 2)
2. Final remarks of solution
You had a lot of evidence to support your claims which was good. You also gave statistics, but you should add more stats from actual college campuses in the past 5 years to give a better understanding of how dangerous the flu can be. Since you provided a lot of information it should help you put together a very informative PPT.
ReplyDeleteSome Ideas to Consider:
-Another idea that you can write about is that student athletes at the University of Iowa get offered a free flu shot every year (it is their choice). Other students do not get this opportunity.
-For the images that you can use for your slides could be a picture of the actual shot, places on campus with a lot of bacteria, and you could also put some graphs with stats in them.
Overall great job. You provided many good points and have a clear topic.
Does the writer need to provide more vivid description of the problem?
ReplyDelete-Suggestion: throw in a story or an example in your dorm of sickness or something to make it more relatable.
Does the proposal need to provide more details on the steps to be taken to implement the solution?
-Good!
Should the writer provide more reasons? discuss alternative solutions? present cost-benefit analysis, bring in some precedents?
-Could lower the cost for students if cannot make free.
Are there enough evidences to persuade the audience about the seriousness of the problem and the justification for the solution?
-One counterargument would be some insurances pay for flu shots. I know mine does.
Has the writer considered priorities and values of the audience in selecting and developing reasons and evidences?
-Some individuals do not believe in flu shots, but that audience does not really matter in this situation.
GOOD JOB!